Turd Ferguson Makes it to Jeopardy, Ahmed Mohamed Handcuffed Over Homemade Clock, The Gentleman's Guide to Drinking like a Man

Thursday, Aug 24, 2017

Turd Ferguson Makes It To Jeopardy

Turd Ferguson Makes it to Jeopardy

“What is the love ballad of Turd Ferguson
p.s. hi mom:)”

This was Talia Lavin’s answer to the question, “This song from a 1999 animated film about censorship had a word censored from its Oscar performance.”

She lost the $600, but her answer was absolutely epic.

As most of you remember, and others of you should slap yourself for not knowing, this originated when Norm MacDonald was playing Jeopardy as Burt Reynolds on SNL, with Will Ferrell playing the role of Trebek. Burt (Norm) insists he is called by the name Turd Ferguson, because well, “it’s a funny name.”

And the internet loves her

Twitter erupted with love for Lavin after she got Trebek to repeat her answer, giving an entire generation of SNL lovers something everyone has longed to hear since we first laughed at it.

She may have messed up on the category of “Oscar-nominated Songs,” but we feel she deserves a Daytime Emmy for best contestant of all time.

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Ahmed Mohamed Handcuffed Over Homemade Clock

Ahmed Mohamed Handcuffed Over Homemade Clock

Only analog in Texas

Ahmed Mohamed, a 14 year old student just outside of Dallas wanted to show his teacher his badass homemade clock he built all by himself. He was pumped about it, and he wanted to show it off.

His teacher was not a fan. 

Ahmed’s clock started beeping during English class, alarming his teacher, and prompting her to have police brought in. Ahmed at no time said it was a bomb, he maintained it was a clock, police agreed after questioning the boy for an hour and a half, then continued to lead him out in handcuffs.

This sparked large debates and questions, with Mohamed’s own father asking whether this would have been the same course of action had Ahmed been a white child.

But, Ahmed comes out with the win

Eventually, Mohamed was released, and then suspended from school. But while his principle and teachers may not have been on his side, the social media world definitely was, with President Obama tweeting an invite for Ahmed to bring his clock to the White House. Even Mark Zuckerberg got behind the young engineer, and offered him a tour of Facebook on his personal Facebook page.

While Ahmed might have had to endure some unfair judgement for his ambitious mind, he definitely knows their are more open minds around the rest of the United States.

 

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The Gentleman's Guide To Drinking Like A Man

The Gentleman's Guide to Drinking like a Man

What you drink says a lot about who you are

Pass on those light beers and put down that white wine spritzer, because Life, Tailored is here to teach you how to drink like a man.

The drink in your hand says a lot about your personality, and these manly drinks convey the confidence and bravado of a modern man. Consider this your field guide to drinking like a gentleman. Here are some basic rules to follow and keep in mind in order to drink like a true gentleman.

If it’s good enough for Don Draper, it’s good enough for you

If there was ever a show that taught you how to drink like a man, it was Mad Men. The amount of drinking on that show was incredible, and you should consider the laundry list of cocktails and alcohol they drink at Sterling, Cooper, Draper, and Pryce as your unofficial list of drinks worth drinking.

Manhattans and Old Fashioneds are right at the top of this list. If you want to know how to make a proper Manhattan or Old Fashioned, mosey on over to Life, Tailored’s Complete Guide on Becoming a Mixologist. Here’s the link.

Martinis shouldn’t have lychee in them

A real is never caught ordering anything called an appletini either, unless it’s for the lovely lady on his arm. A proper martini should have 3 things in it: gin (or a top-shelf vodka), vermouth, and an olive garnish.

Get your whisky right

First things first, know the difference between a bourbon, scotch and so on. The easiest way to distinguish this is where the bottle is from, Scotch is from Scotland, Bourbon is made in the U.S., Rye is made in Canada, and Whisk(e)y is made in Ireland.

When it comes to drinking whisky, its best to have it on its own. A couple of droplets of water activates the flavor and tones down the fire of the alcohol. If you absolutely need to drink it with ice, get spherical ice since it doesn’t melt as fast. Too much water and you’re killing the flavors you should be enjoying.

Know a little something about wine 

No one is asking you to have sommelier level knowledge. But knowing about a good bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon or knowing the basics (i.e. what to drink with fish or red meat) will go a long way for you, and keep you looking good in your date’s eyes.

Basically, if you drank it when you were 21, leave it behind now

These are the years where you’ve grown to love the taste of beer, so grow to love more. Ditch the vodka sodas and crap mixed with diet coke. You’re a man now, damnit!

Want to learn the rest of the Life, Tailored steps to drinking like a real man? Check out the entire guide at Lifetailored.com. Just make sure to implement them in your weekend festivities. 

 

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