Jared from Subway is an Awful Person, 7 Tips to Getting the Perfect Used Rolex, How to Clean Suede Shoes

Tuesday, Aug 22, 2017

Jared From Subway Is An Awful Person

Jared from Subway is an Awful Person

Jared Fogle Pleads Guilty to Child Porn and Sex with Minors 

Jared, the Subway spokesman who lost 245 lbs and then refused to go away, is as big a piece of shit as he is annoying.

Fogle and the executive director of his foundation admitted to charges of child pornography. Jared also plead guilty to sex with minors. He apparently took business trips to NYC and sought out underage girls via prostitutes.

According to USA Today, Fogle will spend a minimum of five years locked up, and pay $1.4 million in restitution for being a horrible person. Plus his wife left him, which just makes us a little happier.

No More Subway Money

Needless to say, the sandwich franchise has severed ties with the pedophile, making several public comments on how his actions are inexcusable.

Jared is set to spend no less than five, and no more than 12.5 years behind bars. His attorney released this statement:

“Jared understands that he has hurt innocent people, vulnerable people, and his family,”…”He has expressed remorse to me and to his loved ones, and will, when given the opportunity, express that remorse to this court and to the people he has harmed. His intent is to spend the rest of his life making amends.”

All we can say is… Have fun in prison, you dick.

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7 Tips To Getting The Perfect Used Rolex

7 Tips to Getting the Perfect Used Rolex

Rolex for Less

We did our research, and it turns out Rolexes are pretty damn expensive. But we wanted one anyway, so we put together a list of steps to make sure we found a good one.

It worked for us, and we want to share our wisdom with you. So here it is.

1. Find a Dealer

While Ebay and Craigslist are great for smaller purchases, a Rolex is an investment, even a used one, and you should buy it from someone who knows what they are doing.

2. Learn How to Spot a Fake

An obvious step, but not all fakes are obvious.

Look at the second hand, if it ticks instead of moving smoothly it’s not the real thing. Also, check out the date window, real Rolexes will always be magnified.

3. Get it Authenticated

Be sure to do this immediately after purchasing so if you have been defrauded there is at least a better chance of recovering your funds. Have it opened up and guaranteed the inside is as real as the outside.

4. Make Sure You Can Get Your Money Back

Don’t be a schmuck. Use PayPal or a credit card that has fraud protection in case you’re dealing with someone less upstanding than yourself.

5. Box and Papers

While the watch is what you really care about, the extras matter too. While this isn’t the biggest factor, it’s an extra step most fakers won’t bother to take. And that’s good for you.

6. How’s the Inside Holding Up?

Make sure the inner workings are in the same beautiful shape as the outside. You wouldn’t buy a used car without bringing it to a mechanic first, this can be in the same price realm, so same rule applies.

7. Don’t Rush It

The perfect watch isn’t going to show up overnight. Take your time and shop around until you find the right one.

But once you find it, don’t hesitate, pull the trigger.

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How To Clean Suede Shoes

How to Clean Suede Shoes

Keep it Clean

Fall is coming, and you should be rocking at least one pair of suede kicks. But no one looks good with dirty suede, so we’re going to help you clean up last year’s pair.

You can find our entire list here, but for now we’re going to give you the most common problems and their remedies.

Rain

What You’ll Need

 

What You’ll Do

  • Put the bunched up towel inside your shoe, soaking up as much as possible
  • Using the spray bottle, spritz water lightly on the shoe, covering the whole thing evenly
  • Let your shoes dry
  • Use the suede brush to make your shoes look like new

Mud

What You’ll Need

  • Butterknife
  • Toothbrush
  • Soft cloth
  • Suede brush

Then Do This

  • Take off your shoes and leave them alone– let the mud dry 100%
  • Use the knife to crack and scrape the mud off
  • Use a toothbrush to brush off the remaining chunks and anything stuck in a crevice
  • Finish with suede brush and stop going in the mud, you child

Scuff Marks

What You’ll Need

  • Pencil eraser (for small, light scuffs)
  • Suede eraser
  • Suede brush

Use Them to…

  • If it’s small, use the pencil eraser to remove the scuff going over it gently in a circular motion
  • If it’s a large scuff, use a suede eraser
  • Use suede brush to breathe life back into your shoes
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